And this bitch has a few things to say right quick. 

1.  Tell me why it’s my motherfucking birthday and I was riding on home when these damn cracker ass drivers just kept braking for no reason.  And I’m chill high right now… smoked a blizzy on the interstate like it was nothin.  Anywho, I just got road rage and started honking the shit outta my little cheesy ass car.   Apparently the bitch in front of me in her small white, pasty, mayonnaisey vehicle had a case of road rage her damn self (must’ve been the humidity, or the fact that she looked like a gym school teacher dyke… I swear I saw a whistle around her neck lol)… look at me, laughing at my own shit.  Damn shame.  The moral of this story is that this bitch is dead wrong for fucking around with me on my motherfucking birthday.  She need to get that little white ass car that matches her little white ass ass… AND GET THE FUCK OUT MY WAY.  Point blank. 

2.  IT’S MY BIRTHDAY.  I am 21 years old.  Bout to do it big.  I hit up Harrahs casino with my sponsor at midnight like my name was Teirra Mari and came outta that bitch 75 cents richer.  That Deuces Wild is my game.  Later on tonight I’m going partyin like I always do.  Friday is all planned out as well and it is gonna be amazing, I already know it.   Damn, that reminds me… got to get a bottle of vodka after this blog.  I’ve been on a bitchie budget thanks to my girl Necole Bitchie, which basically means that I’ve been living on straight up Top Ramen Beef and chips and Nestle Pure Life water for the past week.  Saving my money.  Need to get to California… always jettisoning my long term goals and aspirations for partying and whatnot.  Got to stop all that… or just a tone it down a little. 

3.  I’ve grown a little fond of straight men this like past month or so.  I find myself turned on by the psychology of it all.  I just toot the booty up and they go thrashin.  Start pouncing on me like the Lion King.  Still not sure what the fuck that lame ass sequel was all about though.  …….. I’m kind of done with this number.  I’m sitting here with my mouth open trying to squeeze out another goddamn sentence but I’d rather press on.  Love me some straight men though.

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