Willow Smith

That little brat is Illuminati.  I tried to write this damn entry a few minutes ago and the screen froze.

Signed to Jay-Z, 10 years old talking about “I whip it real good… just whip it”… yeah this bitch is definitely bad news for society. I can read through the lines just as much as you can. Open your eyes.

I Gotta “Pussy Squad”

I made up a random ass song yesterday.  It’s pretty short.  Silly.

PUSSY SQUAD

 

i got that pussy power
i gotta pussy squad
let’s build a pussy ranch
wit my pussy broads
(repeat)

come thru
smellin like straight up sushi
grade a
niggas high off this po-potent coochie
my pussy girls sling it like a goddamn whip
hear that shit pop
yeah, it’s goin off
perfume
lookin right
nipples extra soft
champagne business niggas
bout to set me off
jada pinkett smith wit my benja-benjamins
pussy squad bustin like nuts on a whim
if you aint on money then you need to pa-pass go
cuz my pussy ranch aint wit it unless them pockets real low

hook

Your Love is a One in a Million…

It goes on & on & on.

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Get BIG Motherfuckers

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Learn English

If you can’t spell or formulate a simple sentence then you don’t need to be on Myspace. POINT BLANK. You need to be on HOOKEDONPHONICS.COM asap because lately my eyes have been SUFFERING from y’alls complete mutilation of the English language. Stupidity isn’t accepted in this society people…. you will fail. Some of the people that have commented my bulletins and statuses in the past are beyond HOPELESS. If you think that this bulletin pertains to you, THEN IT DOES. Get that fucking grammar, spelling, punctuation UP UP UP AND AWAY. Typing with @ signs and alt key symbols is NOT cute. It’s an EYESORE. YOU LOOK RETARDED. MAYBE YOU ARE RETARDED. MAYBE YOU SHOULD PAY MORE FUCKING ATTENTION TO YOUR TEACHERS AND QUIT TEXTING, WRITING NOTES, SLEEPING DURING CLASS. Do something with your life. Most importantly, FUCK UP OUTTA HERE. Don’t come at me talking shit when you don’t even know the difference between your and you’re, their, they’re, and there. YOU WILL NEVER AMOUNT TO SHIT if you continue to write like “h3y th@nkz 4 th33 @dd”. You might just wanna commit suicide right here and now. GET IT TOGETHER. That is all. Tell your fucking mother I said she needs to raise you better because your parents are doing a piss poor fucking job.

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Money

Money is all that is on my mind right now.  I really don’t care about anything else.  Not you.  Not your fucking mother.  Does she have money?  Because if she doesn’t then I definitely could care less about her.  I am a money hungry bitch.  Eat it.  

- Stop talking……. why?  Because you’re not talking about MONEY.  No one cares.  You’re not on the money.  You’re on a whole lotta of nothing. 

- Your sister died?  Oh how sad.  Let’s change the subject to something a little greener.  I’m looking to get paid.

- Money has made me delusional.  Everything is green to me.  Just like a motherfucking hundred dollar bill.  Crisp & green.  This computer I’m typing on is green.  I got a brand new fucking green desk with my green pencil and my green mousepad.  That nigga that lives across the street is also green too.

- Fuck 9 to 5.  Fuck minimum wage.  Fuck hard labor.  Fuck retail.  Fuck food.  BITCH I ONLY FUCK WITH CORPORATE.  I am a corporate bitch.  Self-made & self-paid.

- Money.  Nuff said.  This bullet is done.

- Doesn’t money just make you soooooooo happy?  Right… thought so.  Then why are you READING THIS WHEN YOU SHOULD BE MAKING MONEY????  Wtf?  I seriously don’t understand.  I just can’t be your friend.  You’re not about money.

- I go to a restaurant.  I look at the menu.  I see money being spent.  That is a big no no.  MONEY NEEDS TO BE MADE, NOT SPENT.  Rule number 1.

- The best things in life are free… but money trumps everything.  Fuck free… bitch pay me. 

- Ay, I’M LOOKIN TO GET PAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$

- Still reading?  Bitch didn’t I just tell you that you should be on the grind making money right now?  Stupid. 

- I have a very foul mouth.  Offensive.  Lewd.  Disgusting.  Wait I’m sorry this bullet isn’t about money BUT BITCH WATCH ME MAKE IT INTO MONEY.  All you got to do is sprinkle it with a little bit of these $$$$$$$$ and bam:

Money.

- I always know the topic of conversation because it’s always money.

- Whatever you do, do not steal money.  Always earn it.  KARMA will be after you and your paper chase. & you will get chased up.  It is inevitable.  Drop all of those who are useless and worthless to you…. delete them out of your contacts right now… because they mean nothing. They don’t mean money. So they don’t mean squat. Their value is null. Null is NO FUCKING GOOD, BRO. NO FUCKING GOOD.

Basically, I’m about my money. If you aren’t then I don’t know what you’re about. People who aren’t thinking about money are people who aren’t thinking about anything.  I see people like this all day, everyday with their blank ass faces and their empty ass wallets.  I feel sorry for them.  Credit cards are the Devil and if you have one then all that tells me is that you don’t have money. No money. No mucho dinero. No bills. No Benjis. No nothing. And…. I’m spent. Done. Finished with this entry. Today is a new day and there is new money to be made. Wake wake, chop chop. $

*[moneynote]: I’m in love with a bitch named MONEY. She is so goddamn good to me.

It’s So Sad

That everything in this world is based on image.  Can’t be seen with a zit in public.  Can’t leave the house without makeup.  Getting your wants and needs all tangled up when it comes to things like plastic surgery.  Blah blah blah.  I mean… I am no doubt guilty of doing all kinds of examples of this, but I don’t blame myself for this shit.  I just swooooooooooooooooooon.  We are victims, you and I.  Oh well… sad but bearable.  Just as long as you know that you are beautiful.  Don’t let anyone ever tell you different.

I Want Some Steak N Shake

I’m so glad I don’t gain any significant weight when I eat unhealthy or like a cow (which is everyday).  I have some good ass genes. 

You know what else I have?

THE MUNCHIES.

And right now, out of all those oh so convenient 24-hour resturants… this bitch is thinking Steak N Shake.  They have these amazing $2.89 steakburger Snack Packs and I am seriously hooked. 

Sounds so fucking good doesn’t it?  Yeah… so good that you’re willing to get it when you know damn well your ass is gonna be exploding all over that toilet in the next hour or so.  Actually, I take that back… less than an hour.  I recall this one time I ate Steak N Shake inside the actual resturant and the food was so greasy it just cruised on through my guts like death and I ended up pooin it up in their restroom.  I’m talking liquid shit… spilling out of my butthole like knocked over artist paint.  Blooooooooooooooooooooop.

I don’t know why I expose you people to such filthy shit.  I just like to.  I like to go out to Six Flags and rap Trina lyrics as loud as I can for all the little square ass families, with their uptight morals, and way higher standards.  Puh-lease.  I’ll never be judged.  By who?  By someone who isn’t perfect?  By someone who has… flaws?    DO YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.  DO YOU. 

Speaking of doing you… my man Twista has some new hot shit called “I Do”.  If you have not heard it then you are in for a real treat.  Every line he spits in this song is straight G:

I love how this entry went from Steak N Shake to a completely different topic.  My mind rambles.  Before I go, I have a present for you guys.  A kiss.  A kiss because you are reading these words that are pouring out of my brain and into my hands.  A kiss because you are aware of my existence.  A kiss because you are beautiful.

Muahhhhh.

Have a great fucking day and remember to always think positive. I will be back. I have such an interesting story to tell you when you visit me again.

It’s My Fucking Birthday

And this bitch has a few things to say right quick. 

1.  Tell me why it’s my motherfucking birthday and I was riding on home when these damn cracker ass drivers just kept braking for no reason.  And I’m chill high right now… smoked a blizzy on the interstate like it was nothin.  Anywho, I just got road rage and started honking the shit outta my little cheesy ass car.   Apparently the bitch in front of me in her small white, pasty, mayonnaisey vehicle had a case of road rage her damn self (must’ve been the humidity, or the fact that she looked like a gym school teacher dyke… I swear I saw a whistle around her neck lol)… look at me, laughing at my own shit.  Damn shame.  The moral of this story is that this bitch is dead wrong for fucking around with me on my motherfucking birthday.  She need to get that little white ass car that matches her little white ass ass… AND GET THE FUCK OUT MY WAY.  Point blank. 

2.  IT’S MY BIRTHDAY.  I am 21 years old.  Bout to do it big.  I hit up Harrahs casino with my sponsor at midnight like my name was Teirra Mari and came outta that bitch 75 cents richer.  That Deuces Wild is my game.  Later on tonight I’m going partyin like I always do.  Friday is all planned out as well and it is gonna be amazing, I already know it.   Damn, that reminds me… got to get a bottle of vodka after this blog.  I’ve been on a bitchie budget thanks to my girl Necole Bitchie, which basically means that I’ve been living on straight up Top Ramen Beef and chips and Nestle Pure Life water for the past week.  Saving my money.  Need to get to California… always jettisoning my long term goals and aspirations for partying and whatnot.  Got to stop all that… or just a tone it down a little. 

3.  I’ve grown a little fond of straight men this like past month or so.  I find myself turned on by the psychology of it all.  I just toot the booty up and they go thrashin.  Start pouncing on me like the Lion King.  Still not sure what the fuck that lame ass sequel was all about though.  …….. I’m kind of done with this number.  I’m sitting here with my mouth open trying to squeeze out another goddamn sentence but I’d rather press on.  Love me some straight men though.

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I’ve Been Gone For A Minute…

But motherfuckers I’m back.  WATCH THIS SHIT.  I’m still practicing it… I have about 2 weeks until my big performance at the Complex Nightclub, where I will be in full on drag and ready to rock the stage like no other BITCH.  With the aid of the amazing STL Hoop Club as my backup dancers, you’re guaranteed to be entertained to death.  See you all there.  June 4th.  Show starts at 11pm.  3515 Chouteau Ave, St Louis, MO.